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    Senile Trump, 79, Rambles About Donuts While Defending Greenland Invasion

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    The 79-year-old president of the United States just rambled about donuts while defending his unauthorized military attack on a sovereign nation and the kidnapping of its leader. This is where we are now.

    In a sit-down interview with Fox News’ Sean Hannity, Donald Trump attempted to justify the U.S. invasion of Venezuela—which Congress never approved—by explaining how oil prices affect baked goods.

    “Everything follows oil. Oil is so big, everything follows oil. If oil prices are down, everything’s down,” Trump said.

    “It affects everything. It affects a truck that delivers donuts. It affects the stove that makes the donut. It affects everything.”

    THE DETAILS: Before his pastry tangent, Trump was busy bragging about what he framed as the operation’s achievements—and accidentally saying the quiet part out loud (again).

    “That was a perfect attack. Think of what we’ve done. We’ve taken over a whole country. We’re going to make the country strong and good. We’re going to ultimately be able to vote and put somebody in that they like,” Trump said. “We’ve taken $4 billion worth of oil in one day, and that’ll increase. We’re going to have it rebuilt. All the big oil companies are coming in. They’re going to make a lot of money, and Venezuela is going to get some of that money, and we’re going to get some of that money.”

    BUT BUT BUT: The Trump administration has repeatedly insisted this wasn’t about oil at all—just a simple “law enforcement operation” to bring detained Venezuelan leader Nicolás Maduro to New York to face “narcoterrorism” charges. Of course, Trump keeps undermining that talking point every time he opens his mouth.

    Earlier this week, Trump announced on Truth Social that Venezuela would be “turning over between 30 and 50 MILLION Barrels” for the U.S. to sell, adding that “that money will be controlled by me.” He’s also admitted he tipped off U.S. oil companies about the invasion before it happened.

    When the New York Times asked how long he plans to effectively run a country of 30 million people, the “America First” president had a characteristically incoherent answer: “Only time will tell.”

    When pressed on whether that meant three months, six months, or a year, Trump replied: “I would say much longer.”

    ZOOM OUT: We’re watching an American president openly admit to invading a country for its oil, installing a government of his choosing, and personally controlling billions in petroleum revenue—while defending it all with a tangent about donut logistics. The interview was also notable for Trump complaining that New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani “hit” him over the whole abducting-a-foreign-leader thing.

    In a separate moment during the Times interview, Trump—who officially weighs 224 pounds according to his latest physical—admitted he “probably should” be taking weight loss drugs like Ozempic or Wegovy.

    BOTTOM LINE: The leader of the free world just justified an unauthorized military invasion of a sovereign nation using donut economics, admitted he has no exit strategy, and confirmed the oil money will be “controlled by me.” This isn’t normal. None of this is normal.

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